We are mainly here because we are single,most of us are here as well after a failed relationship,quite a few have kids etc.
Most on here are looking for long term relationships,ie the happily ever after thing.
What if you were to meet someone who,has a finite time on the planet,and who knew that there quality of life could and probaley would be seriously impaired by there illness,thankfully not me,but close enough for me to be asking the question.
Would you consider having a relationship with them knowing that you could end up caring for them completely,if you were that person would you not want to enter a relationship because you felt that you were making the other party suffer.
Please do not question me for any more detail as I am really going on out on a limb here,the rule of six links between any two humans on this planet,sometimes can work in unexpected ways and this is a very personal piece of information that has been shared with me,
Why not............. A few moments of happiness or a lifetime of regret for not taking the chance.
If I were the healthy person, and the person I met was not so healthy... I would still be willing to go down that route.
If I were the not so healthy person I would be so happy that someone cared about me enough not to care about my infirmity.
Happiness may only be brief... but it will be an eternity in the memory.
one day of true happyness with that special person is worth dying for, if the feeling is that strong then i think most would go for it with out thinking about it
Sean If you have met this special person fell in love , and then found out that her time is limited in her present capacity the make the most of the time you have with her enjoy every second , all the above are very valid .
However you asking for advice casts doubt on the strenght of your love for that person have you reserched the illness on the internet ? have you looked at the sort of care which is availiable for careres ? are you prepared for the effect on your current lifestyle ?
if you answer no to any of the above you need to make some tough choices
If your answer is yes then you have some challenges ahead but the main link is that you have this special person in your life .
without knowing what the debillitating condition is it is very hard to point you in the right direction and give specific advice or care pathways if you would like my advice please drop me a pm
it is very hard to make decsions like this at time s as the reality of caring for the one you love is never easy
good luck
best regards
Derek
witho
Thanks for your replies,I was almost thinking that maybe i was the only person who thought this way.Derek this does not effect me directly,I was asked what I would do in these circumstances,I like you would make the most of the time left,a fair few have disagreed outside off the net,and there has been some debate/auguement and as i said more details are not a good idea.
thereb is no real chance of showing this to either party,just wanted to make sure that the gut feeling I had would be the same for most people SEAN
i b honest if i just met sumone and they sed they wanna get to know me but hadthis incurable illnes it wud put me off because without sounding harsh i wudent know if i wud want to take it on ,however if i found out my partner had only a short time left i wud still stay with him as i love him and thats a part of loving sumone and being with them ,ur there till the end well ur meant to b ,but even married couples have split up over things like that ,sum people are strong enuff for the both of u others are not and wil run at the ist hurdle !
Sean hun I can relate to what ur saying, as I myself am disabled and have to be taken everywhere in a wheel chair, I have had this infliction since I was born but have learnt to live with it.
I was married for 24 years then got divorced but not because of my illness as at the time I wasn't as bad as I am now.
A year ago I met my new partner but I told him that I wouldn't get better and would gradually get worse, didn't expect it to be so soon though, well he has stuck by me and is great person to be with, also he is only 32 and i'm 50 so I felt as though I was tying him down but he told me he wanted to be with me no matter what came about.
sorry if i have rattled on as much but thought this might help in ur situation hun .
Any time u need to chat just call me hun xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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