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Jokes, Games & Silly Things

sheep story

sheep story - Forums [Biker Match] sheep story - Forums [Biker Match]
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sheep story

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Welshman buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After several weeks , he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant. The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself. So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again. He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted. Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round. Try again.' he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls knackered into bed. The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window.. He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass. 'No,' she says, 'they're all in the Land Rover…….. >>>>>>> and one of them is beeping the horn.'

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tangoman60 @ 26/02/2009 16:46  

I must admit, when I saw this thread, I thought it must be from/ about SP. But, hats off to TM, this is the funniest post ever! LMAO

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Deleted Member @ 26/02/2009 17:28  

brill tm

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drobess @ 26/02/2009 17:53  

nice one

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meza95 @ 26/02/2009 18:01  

If you are going to do a sheep, always do it with the sheep facing over a cliff edge, then it backs into you.

Who needs wellies when there's sticky back velcro.

On the inside of the knees of course.

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vinnie @ 26/02/2009 19:49  

u seem to know way too much vinnie

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chunkichick @ 26/02/2009 20:05  

I agree with you there CC ,are you talking from experince Vinnie? New topic for forum maybe ?

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Deleted Member @ 26/02/2009 20:11  

Nice one TM,, and XK i knew you would come up with something.. Vinnie, you do need wellies, it's to stop them from running away.

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SP @ 26/02/2009 20:38  

Hey SP, long time no see - must get together sometime - maybe Matlock? And bring luvly pony.

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Deleted Member @ 26/02/2009 20:48  

Busy selling my house at the mo.. As soon as Pony and i get the time off, you'll be seeing us again.. Take care my friend.

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SP @ 26/02/2009 20:57  

Naahhh. Not talking from experience, just smarter than your average bear and can see the commercial possibilities of marketing velcro to sheep shaggers.

Just call me Harold.

My work here is done.

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vinnie @ 26/02/2009 21:21  


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Deleted Member @ 26/02/2009 22:31  

nice piccy's chunki an Harley G

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tangoman60 @ 27/02/2009 00:14  

awe thanks tm

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chunkichick @ 27/02/2009 00:33  

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