It has taken me ages to pluck up courage to go and visit my late husbands grave recently. My girls want to take their Daddy some Xmas cards and pressies to put on his grave...so I went over today to tidy up etc and to put my Xmas card and Xmas roses on his grave to find that it has been trashed and all the lovely toys, beaded birds and butterflies and all the other momentos left by my girls in memory of their Daddy have been stolen...
Words cannot begin to describe how I feel...what utter disrespect...I hope they rot in hell....
Unfortunately, it's not isolated. I don't know what possesses people to act like it, but they do, time and time again.
I don't know what your situation is, but do you have a garden? Might be nice to give a corner of it to your girls - they can plant a special rose or other flowers for their Daddy and tend it regularly... a focal point for them to go and talk to him whenever they want, rather than worrying about whether anyone's stolen everything from his grave in the future? Somewhere safe for them to leave gifts for him too. And remind them that he's always with them, not just when they go to visit his grave.
Personally I would also make up a story about his grave and why the mementos are no longer there... It's hard enough for an adult to cope with the mentality of the scum in this world, let alone innocent children.
I really feel for you BC... I know it counts for very little, but for what it's worth, you're all in my thoughts tonight xxx
Rose... ((big Hugs)) that is jus so sad...but like WB says its just not an isolated case these days.
Thats a lovely idea tho, to have a focal point in yr garden. I know its not quite the same, but at least the girls 'gifts' will not be stolen.
Just tell them that their Daddy still has the beautiful memories of them and thats wot matters most.
Hope yr ok ...was good to see you on Saturday too...and looking good ... nice new pic too
tek care
Kaz xx
ach Rose - I'm so sorry to hear this! As Kaz & WB say - a special corner of your garden may be a nice.
Am too angry (as you are) to say any more as it'll just be expletives!
My Biggest hugs to you & your girls xxxxxxxxxxx
this is gonna sound bad to some but i never visit parents graves never wanted them [my sister did, i would have cremated an scattered the ashes]as i knew things like this happen and i wouldnt have maintained the things anyway, my parents are not there in the ground but in my head, every day i think about them sometime, i dont need memorials, i understand some do need a place to go,sick sad stupid people who cant think of other's feeling's are a fact of life it's always been so, it happens and always will, the gdn idea is a good one, life can be crap sometimes,
Really sorry to read that BC, have you spoken to anyone at the cemetary about it as we had the same thing happen to my Dad's grave but it turned out that some of the things my girls had left on it were removed by the cemetary as they were classed as not allowed, they even made my brother remove a beautiful wooden cross he had carved for our Dad. They reckon the reason being it was difficult to mow the lawns with things people left of graves.
I am like TM I don't visit my dad's grave as my Dad is in my mind most days of the week and I don't like to think of him buried in the ground. I think the garden idea is a good idea as then they can have their quiet time to think about their daddy when ever they want.
Thanks for your comments....I agree, memories of good times are always with you...its just the fact that the girls liked to go and put things on there...that is what upset me the most...I have now decided to have a place for their Dad in our garden where the girls can go and talk to him or give him little pressies...it just breaks my heart seeing them so hurt and missing him like crazy especially with Christmas coming up...
HUGS to you too RC and to anyone else who has experienced this sort of thing...
I have experienced this happening several times on my dads grave before - once was a day after I'd taken flowers, it was christmas and mum and myself went back the morning after because it was early days, but they had been destroyed beyond recognition and the card was destroyed and my kids letters too. I hope the scum who do this rot it hell and may one day realise how much they hurt others, if and when the same happens to their loved ones. I dont leave anything now to be destroyed, and to be honest I've not been to dad for a few years, he lives on in my head and my heart
Hi rose U wrote me a nice letter when i first joined BM.
As we have both have lost some one special,i to can share your loss.
I red what u wrote on the forum and it upsett me.
Ive seen allot ov nasty things people do and its not right.
I went to a BM meet, not 4 long ,but Karey made me welcolme,i like good people.
And ime going 2 go 2 more and ill say hello 2 u if i c u.
As u said 2 me.
I just wanted to wish you every happiness. Hope you find friendship peace and life long happiness
I wish the same 4 u
Andy
Hey Andy.. thats a reet nice thing to say.
I'm sure Rose will take comfort in that
And yehhh get yaself to a few more meets.. you will always be made welcome.
For all the nasty people out there, there are lots of good ones too.
Take Care
Kaz
![What sort of lowlife would do such a thing!! - Forums [Biker Match]](/images/backgrounds/strips/8mobileLQ.jpg)
![What sort of lowlife would do such a thing!! - Forums [Biker Match]](/images/backgrounds/strips/8desktopLQ.jpg)
