Well I don't think turning up with a woman they had never met unexpected would really help maintain an amicable relationship over the kids with an exwife/ partner lol
drobess..... never said women should not ride bikes and all t respect for the ones that do i just said some men find em a threat to their masculinity !!!! am gonna shut up now and go chew on me bone in me cave lol
Unfortunately for my kids I dont have much choice on them meeting new people with me for the first time as I dont have any family opr friends nearby to look after them but its always during the day and in neutral territory anyway and its not as if I'd be naughty with them there anyway. I love my kids and they go everywhere with me and I would never hide the fact that they exist as Im so proud of them but luckily they are young enough to not yet get attached to anyone so soon besides Willow is 22 months and she is superb at socialising with adults when I travel to see friends. Ash is only 10 months and knows no different. Some of us dont have any choice but to have our kids there when we meet someone but I really dont mind as they dont miss out on a nice day out then too. Anyway as it is I have made some good friends on here from before and this time and she is so used to bikes too.
JTB I agree with you on running it passed your ex ..... at the end of the day if the child / children meet your new partner then adjustments have to be made and its better if all parties are watching out for the youngsters.
Tiny tots are not so much fazed by new partner but the older they get the harder it gets. My teenage daughter was a nightmare lol
mmm you are in a difficult situation kerry and i would suggest tryn to make freinds locally, your kids are young that you probably do the mother toddler groups which is always a good way of meeting other mums/dads in the same position maybe you could then help each other out by babysitting,
I have been on my own a long time, have 3 girls now 25, 21, 17 and there were times when i was isolated from family and freinds and i found a group called gingerbread which was for single parents and they were a great support, weekly meetings, outings, that sort of thing just a chance to meet adults and have a grown up conversation was a god send at times.
and as for letn dates meet the kids i wasnt so keen on that so a didnt date for a few years and when i did a still did,nt really meet any1 that a would actully introduce the kids to. so am kind of set in ma ways now and I still dont really let the girls meet any1 that i,m dating that side of my life is completely seprate even now. Is that a good thing a dont know? it works for me and the girls for now
id worry more about callin ya kids willow and ash bandit..if u have a 3rd u gonna call it twig lol... only messin..cute names.. i called mine siobhan tuesday.. :-)
RustyKnight In: Newton Aycliffe
Posts: 2462
Karma:
*not bothered but why say different*
Nutkin this isn't the place for this conversation but at no point did I introduce you as my partner, girlfriend or anything other than a "mate from the bike club" and my kids still have no idea you were anything but so I'm not saying anything different!!
My eldest lads can make their own mind up but as as far as my youngest two go i've never had a girlfriend since splitting with their Mam 5 years ago!
Well... I certainly would not "run it past the ex" if I was in a new relationship! Likewise, he doesn't tell me. It's maybe different because I have the kids pretty much all year round (He lives on The Isle of Mull lol) - but sometimes when they go up there for holidays, they mention "Daddy's friend" ... always makes me smile! I really don't mind, and I have to trust his judgement that whoever he has introduced the kids to is not an axe wielding murderer (oh hang on - he married me once ..... hmmmm )
On the rare occasions that I meet someone 'new' I always tell them about the children, but then I talk about them alot anyway as they are my world. I have seen them over the years become attached to someone 'new' and been hurt when it didn't work out - so these days I am way more careful about introducing anyone, and actually, having been on our own for so long, we have an ideal life that fits round the three of us...so I wonder if I will ever let anyone come into that again? - Maybe that is why I remain single? No self pity in there, I have learnt to be happy being on my own...or once bitten.....
I definately would not run it past my ex as he dont give a toss about me or the kids anyway and does not even come to see them even though I have tried to get him to so many times!!!! So now I have seen a solicitor anyway in case he decides he wants to. They dont even know him now but on a lighter note I been chatting with a fella off of here and we are meeting up as friends and see what happens. We are also meeting at a place the kids will love with lots for them to do so we can have a good old chat while the kids play so it will be a fun day for all of us.
Good Luck Bandit, I hope, if nothing else, that a friendship come of it
As for Kids, I can't comment as I don't have any, but I hope you find a way that works for you.
(quote original post Tell me guys, why is it so hard to get a date with a fella lately. Would you be put off by me having a baby and a toddler. I just want opinions please because Im curious. Thanks
Kerry)and qouote todays post note I been chatting with a fella off of here and we are meeting up as friends and see what happens.
Time reveals all, just decide what you want from life and go get it, and be yourself at all times.
btw, you are wise to seek the thoughts of the 'male' for they are from 'another planet', but never discount the thoughts from a ........
'wise ol'women'.
Rob i've become aware this morning that i may be in danger of 'hi jackin the thread/ goin off subject' buttttt i am a women and as you know we women "must have the last word " , so to clarify for you (under the pretence of clarifing for everyone) "wise ol'women" is a reference to; any member of the female species whose been there,done that, read the book, saw the film,got the t-shirt............. yeah, been round the clock if you like
thanks Holmfirthgirl and we seem to get on well as friends already by just chatting and if nothing else comes of it Im more than happy with that and 'Clarifying Clarissa', (lol) I knew the ladies would join in too as we cant stop ourselves pmsl
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