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Jokes, Games & Silly Things

Limericks

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Limericks

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Anyone know any good ones?




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non-hotmale @ 14/03/2013 07:13  

One fine day in the middle of the night Two dead men got up to fight Back to back they faced each other Drew their swords and shot each other... Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pale of water Jill came down with half a crown She didnt go for water....

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Deleted Member @ 14/03/2013 17:12  

there was a young priest from belgrade,who found a dead pro in a cave,he said "it's disgusting,but she only needs dusting,and think of the money i'll save !!"......................(roar of applause)

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jinx57 @ 14/03/2013 19:16  

there was a young lady from leeds ,who swallowed a packet of seeds,in less than an hour her arse was in flower,and her tits were covered in weeds...!

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jinx57 @ 14/03/2013 19:19  

There was a girl from the Azores
Whose crotch was covered in sores
All the dogs in the street used to eat the green meat
That hung in festoons from her draws.

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non-hotmale @ 14/03/2013 19:55  

Mary had a little skirt with splits right up the sides and everywhere that Mary went the boys could see her thighs. Mary had another skirt 'twas split right up the front ...But she didn't wear that one often.

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davidneale @ 14/03/2013 23:42  

Simple Simon met a pie man going to the fair. Said Simple Simon to the pie man 'What have u got there?' Said the pie man unto Simon "Pies you dickhead".

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davidneale @ 14/03/2013 23:44  

Jack and Jill Went up the hill And planned to do some kissing. Jack made a pass and grabbed her ass Now two of his teeth are missing. Mary had a little lamb Its fleece was white and wispy. Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease And now it's black and crispy.

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davidneale @ 14/03/2013 23:46  

There was a young lady from Nice
Who fell in love with a priest
She said to hell with religion
And show me your pigeon
I bet its 12 inches at least

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non-hotmale @ 15/03/2013 00:09  

Mary had a little pig
It always was a grunting
She tied it to a five barred gate
And kicked its little head in

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mad munky @ 15/03/2013 07:28  



There once was a man from Madrass
Whose bollocks were made out of brass
When he'd bang 'em together
They'd play "Stormy Weather"
And lightning would shoot up his ass










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justjerry @ 15/03/2013 09:19  

There's a woman on-line now called Penny
Whose internet lovers are quite many
Her web-sites the best
Cos she shows off her chest
But none of the fans will get any

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justjerry @ 15/03/2013 09:24  

There was a young man with a shiner
Who met a loose woman from China
She said there's a cure for that
Stick it under my twt
And he ended up with his nose in her vagina.

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non-hotmale @ 15/03/2013 17:41  

......

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Deleted Member @ 15/03/2013 18:13  

I put this in 'Poetry' a while ago but.......................... There was a young lady from ClaphamWho had too many kids and would slap ‘em, Till the council said, “Cease!”Now she calls the policeAnd they come round with tazers and zap ‘em.

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VFR800AJ @ 15/03/2013 18:19  

There once was an old man of LymeWho married three wives at a time.When asked, “Why a third?”He replied, “One's absurd!And bigamy, sir, is a crime.”

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davidneale @ 19/03/2013 13:37  

There once was a woman from Orton,
Who had one big tit and a short un,
To make up for that
She had a cavernous twt
And a fart like an overrun Norton

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non-hotmale @ 19/03/2013 18:04  

.................a place in Ireland...hahahahahaha

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jinx57 @ 20/03/2013 15:03  

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