DON'T waste money on expensive ipods. Simply think of your favourite tune and hum it. If you want to "switch tracks", simply think of another song youlike and hum that instead.DON'T waste money on expensive paper shredders to avoid having youridentity stolen. Simply place a few dog turds in the bin bags along withyour old bank statements.SAVE money on expensive personalised car number plates by simply changing your name to match your existing plate. - Mr. KVL 741Y,DON'T waste money buying expensive binoculars; simply stand closer to the object you wish to view.AN empty aluminium cigar tube filled with angry wasps makes an inexpensive vibrator.SAVE electricity by turning off all the lights in your house and walkingaround wearing a miner's hat.HOUSEWIVES, the best way to get two bottles of washing-up liquid for theprice of one is by putting one in your shopping trolley and the other inyour coat pocket.OLD telephone directories! make ideal personal address books, simply cross out the names and address of people you don't know.SAVE on booze by drinking cold tea instead of whisky. The following morning you can create the effects of a hangover by drinking a thimble full ofwashing up liquid and banging your head repeatedly on the wall.SAVE a fortune on laundry bills. Give your dirty shirts to Oxfam, they willwash and iron them and you can buy them back for fifty pence.OLD people, if you feel cold indoors this winter, simply pop outside forten minutes without a coat, when you go back inside you will really feelthe benefit.CAN'T afford contact lenses? Simply cut out small circles of cling film andpress them into your eyes.WHY pay the earth for expensive jigsaws? Just take a bag of frozen chipsfrom the freezer and try piecing together potatoes.MIX tea with coffee, and leave in the fridge to cool. Hey presto! Toffee.MAKE your own inexpensive mints by leaving blobs of toothpaste to dry on a window sill. Use striped toothpaste to make humbugs.SHOPPERS, when buying oranges, get more for your money by peeling them before taking them to the counter to be weighed.!
Or are you just bitter at #3
SAVE money on expensive personalised car number plates by simply changing your name to match your existing plate. - Mr. KVL 741Y,
That explains the registration on your bike Mr XKL YBR
Told you you'd better start worrying XK lol
Anyway, I like this idea of me being PM, but I'll need to sort out some sort of policies or no-one will ever vote for me.
1. When PM I would make certain roads in the UK 'bike only' on a Sunday.
2. I would ban the ridiculous testing process for all newbie bikers and make the test a much simpler one.
3. Free Cream Eggs for everyone.
4. I would enforce a ban on Eastenders and make the watching of it illegal.
5. I would have the Country revert back to the 3-day week with the same pay as it is now.
6. Every 16th June would be 'Screaming Lord Sutch' day and everyone would be expected to do something different and outrageous on that day.
7. Every house would be made to recycle.
8. Bad jokes (mine) would be made good by Royal decree.
9. Duvet days would be made compulsary.
10. The penguin would be made the UK's National emblem.
11. The hijacking of BM posts would be punishable by a severe teasing.
12. Every child would be made to learn the words for (We are the) Road Crew from birth and it would be made our National anthem.
Can only think of these at the moment. Look out for the BlueBoy manifesto coming to a post near you soon.
My cabinet would be made up from fellow BM'ers, so get your cv's in quick. Current posts include;
Minister for 125's
Minister for investigating great biking roads
Minister for the care of penguins
Coffee maker to the PM (includes responsibility for making smokes)
The PM's motorcycle polisher.
Minister for the teasting and approval of all chocolate products (filled).
BlueBoy for PM - and why not!
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