Found this on another forum....funny!
Today's sermon will be from the book of Haynes, Chapter 3, Verse 10, "Fault diagnosis, Ignition System". 1. And Ahole, who hath a CB100N that didst not start, spoke unto the Lord, "Oh lord, I hath petrol, the holy water of fire, and I hath compression, for there is resistance in the lever of kickstarting, but the bike doth have life". And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. 2. The Lord, who once hadst a CB100N and kneweth what a buggere it couldst be when it wantedst to, said unto Ahole, "My son, hath thou checked thine plug gap? For it may be incorrect, or indeed whiskered. Thou shoudst adjust and clean, or perchance renew, so that ye may have clean running." 3. Ahole didst check his plug of sparking, and finding it to be clean, and well adjusted, said unto the Lord, "Father, the gap is good, and the electrodes bright, but still there is no life!". And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. 4. The Lord replied, "Go forth and check thine points, for they may be dirty, or in need of adjustment." 5. Upon examining the points, Ahole didst indeed find they were dirty, and didst clean them, and yet, even after setting with the papers of Rizla, the bike still hath the hand of Death upon it. And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. 6. "Lord!" exclaimed Ahole. "I hath checked the plug of sparking, and hath cleaned and set the points of contact, but still the bike hath no life!" 7. The Lord, who really just wanted to get back to cleaning his '98 R1, replied, "Ye be buggerrede, for it doth sound like thine coil. Thou shouldst find thee a replacement. Seek ye a breaker's yard, for there thou shalt find thine salvation!" 8. And Ahole didst say unto the Lord, "Arse. I thoughtst as much." And there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth. 9. Ahole didst seek a breaker's yard, but didst not find the CB100N coil that wouldst give his bike life. "Lord!" he cried. "They hath not got one! I am lost!". 10. The Lord sighed. "My child, doest thou not know that a CG125 coil would probably work too? Hath thou not the slightest bit of bodgery in you? Call yourself a biker?" 11. The breaker did indeed hath a coil from a CG125, and upon fitting it the bike didst start, and Ahole saw it was good, and did grin. 12. Ahole said unto the Lord, "Father, I hadst lost my faith, but you showed me the path to enlightenment. Canst thou forgive me?" 13. The Lord said unto Ahole, "Thou art forgiven, my child, for the bike is sent to try you. Make your way to the Hill of Boxes this Sunday, and rejoice with your fellow men. I might pop by for a burger myself, if it's nice." 14. Om Nom Nom Nom.
Isn't he just WB!
I understood it perfectly well thank you very much.
He knows how to make it up to me though...and I'd rather have a can of chain lube over flowers any day!
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