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Psychiatric Help

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trikerider552
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Hello Everyone,Now that I have settled in to BM and found the cupboard with the straight jackets, I thought I would share the following info with you. It is a great comfort to know thatthere is someone who understands us when the medication wears off. The Psychiatric Care Unit Call Centre Hello and thank you for calling Please select from the following options menu: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent , please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6. If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call. If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship. If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press. If you are manic-depressive, hang up. it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway. If you are dyslexic, press 9-6-9-6. If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. But Please wait for the beep. If you have short-term memory loss press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators aretoo busy to talk with you. If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on thefan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever. If you are a member of BM you are beyond help, please press 10 to end the call.

Hello Everyone,Now that I have settled in to BM and found the cupboard with the straight jackets, I thought I would share the following info with you. It is a great comfort to know thatthere is someone who understands us when the medication wears off.
 
The Psychiatric Care Unit Call Centre
 
Hello and thank you for calling Please select from the following options menu:
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent , please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3, 4, 5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want, stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the Mother Ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, hang up. it doesn't matter which number you press, nothing will make you happy anyway.
If you are dyslexic, press 9-6-9-6.
If you are bipolar, please leave a message after the beep or before the beep or after the beep. But Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9. If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators aretoo busy to talk with you.
If you are menopausal, put the gun down, hang up, turn on thefan, lie down and cry. You won't be crazy forever.
If you are a member of BM you are beyond help, please press 10 to end the call.

Update Reply

trikerider552 @ 11/02/2010 17:16